Welcome to our page offering helpful advice on dealing with the emotions following the loss of a loved one. When a loved one dies the emotional impact can be devastating. Here are some simple tips and hints that might offer some help.
Serious loss is something which we will all face at some time in our life. Whilst each person’s response to a loss is a very individual experience, there are some common and shared emotions that many people will feel.
You may feel great sadness and unhappiness; this is perfectly normal. You will need time to come to terms with what has happened. Take things easy.
Coming to terms with a death is a very gradual process, which can take considerable time. There is no right or wrong way to come to terms with a loss, so, do not worry if others around you are coping in a different way.
Seeking Medical Help
If you find you cannot handle your feelings, start suffering physical symptoms, cannot sleep or your work suffers, then you should seek professional help. Make an appointment to see your GP to discuss matters.
Early Thoughts And Feelings After Loss
People often describe shock soon after a loss. They may feel numb, panicky, very tearful or unable to cry at all. Some people find it difficult to sleep. Some find themselves completely unable to cope and need a lot of practical and emotional support from those around them.
Feelings Some Months After Loss
Some people feel a sense of agitation for quite a long time after the death. People may become very active at this time, doing things like cleaning out the whole house. This agitation can sometimes amount to panic and symptoms of anxiety such as breathlessness, palpitations, dry mouth, tingling and dizziness. These experiences are not unusual following a death. These feelings may alternate with depression, tiredness and low mood.
Guilt And Anger
Some people may feel guilt and review the circumstances of the death, and their relationship with the deceased. They may wonder what they could have done differently to have helped the situation. This is also common when there has been relief at someone’s death following a painful and prolonged illness. It is worth remembering that many people feel relief when suffering ends.
Other Peoples Reactions
Other people’s reaction may be difficult for the bereaved person. Sometimes people will be clumsy in what they say or do. Occasionally people will avoid contact with the bereaved person. These reactions are usually because people do not know what to do or say in the face of someone’s grief.
Don’t bottle up your feelings. Express your emotions. People will want to offer support. Try to accept and appreciate it. Talk things through with family and friends. Do not underestimate the fact that your family will experience similar feelings to you. Let them talk things through and express their own feelings. It’s amazing how talking about things can help people come to terms with matters.
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Allow time to yourself to be alone. Take time simply to rest, sleep and think about matters.
You may have regrets, possibly even anger. You have to accept that you can’t change the past and so you should try not to worry or get upset about it. However, remember that you can change the future.
Try and get back into a normal lifestyle. Try to keep a sense of balance. Try to appreciate life itself. Be grateful for all the good things that you have had in your life so far, for example, your health, family and friends.
Your life may never be quite the same again as a result of what has happened and what you may be going through. This is something you have to accept. Try to think of this as an opportunity to make a fresh start in certain areas of your life.
Sometimes when difficult things happen to us we have to dig deep into our characters to pull us through. We have to believe in ourselves and show courage, strength, understanding and perhaps most of all love. Whatever works for you, try to draw on those qualities to help you through.
Probate & Estate Specialists
I’m Adrian Chambers and specialise in Probate and Estate matters. We aim to provide our clients with an outstanding legal service.
We will help and support you and most importantly we work hard for you.
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